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Seriene (wowstead)
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re: The Serieniad

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((Yeah. My flatmate wrote it. Pretty neat birthday gift))

Tiburion (wowstead)
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O.O! Well done indeed!

Lerossa (wowstead)
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 /applaud

Seriene (wowstead)
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re: The Serieniad

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<!--StartFragment-->

The Serieniad

 

 

Sing, mighty goddess, of the greatest quest

Of the fearsome maggot brained Seriene,

Who sought the power of all the worlds

And dreamed of holding it in her rotting hand.

 

She travelléd high, she travelléd low

And still she had so much farther to go.

From far off Silithus to Quel’Thalas,

No stone went unexploded as she searched

For limitless power, more power still.

 

Maggot brained Seriene slaughtered spiders,

Burned dens of infidels, stabbed squishy beasts.

She summoned demons and obliterated them.

She stormed castles and keeps, left none alive.

She would kill whole tribes and entire species,

For a magical ring of intellect plus five.

 

The dark depths of her desire knew no bounds;

Maggot brained Seriene would even descend

To making people like her, for power

Of every kind was to be her domain.

 

Nor fought she alone; the decaying corpse

Bound demons to service her every whim.

Loyal Phanuuz stood between his mistress

And many a fatal blow, while Kregal

Killed foe after foe as he dreamed of when

His axe would fall on a different neck.

 

Beside her too rode her comrades three,

Righteous Sonette, slayer of kittens;

Cunning Slyer, treacherous undead knave;

And Cow, brave, noble, author of this poem.

 

And now, along the great road to power,

A foe stronger than any before appeared.

Doom Lord Kazzak sat on Kil’jaedan’s Throne;

Maggot brained Seriene felt like regicide.

 

Atop her tower the corpse did arm

Her rotting frame with loot of battles past.

The Robes of Dark Suffering draped her grimy breast,

The Lurid Belt of Complicated Tortures cinched her waist.

Draped across her abscessed shoulders was the

Murky Cloak of Misery, and on her feet were the Fluffy Slippers.

Atop her rotting brow she put the Shadowy Crown of Pain,

And lo! she took the Shadowy Crown of Pain off

Because it clashed with the Murky Cloak of Misery.

 

Astride their flying steeds the four advanced,

With Seriene the Terrible leading the way.

Lightning flashed across the skies, and demon cries

Rent the very air in twain as the party flew o’erhead.

 

The Doom Lord raised his head to the high heavens

As the intrepid four dismounted far above.

Cunning Slyer buffed the descending heroes

To slow fall – but not Cow, who plummeted past.

 

The battle began, righteous Sonette

At the fore matching sword and shield

Against demonic claws and fel magics.

 

Back and forth they parried and thrust, til

With a mighty sweep of wicked wings

The Doom Lord knocked righteous Sonette

To the ravaged earth. Triumphant, the demon

Raised his depraved leg to crush the helpless elf.

 

With sudden swiftness cunning Slyer unleashed

The might of magic on the hapless foe.

Barrages of missiles, flames and frosts fired

Down upon Kazzak’s weakened form.

 

Under the mage’s covering fire, noble Cow

Or was it Tree? Restored the strength of the

Righteous Sonette with nature’s rejuvenation.

 

Meanwhile from on high, maggot brained Seriene

Surveyed the shifting tides of battle, waiting, waiting.

 

Below the hill the three did fight, Sonette the Valiant

Before the foe, kept alive with nature’s might

While overhead arcane spells collided with the beast.

 

The battle raged all through the night, until

By morning’s light the heroes and the demon

All were beaten, weak and wounded from the

Fierce conflict hidden in the darkling night.

 

Twas then that maggot brained Seriene struck.

 

She rained fire upon the hapless Tree,

And blasted cunning Slyer with shadow,

And coiled death round righteous Sonette.

So with ease did maggot brained Seriene

Obliterate her friends, who could only

Cry with their dying breaths, “Oom.”

 

Then with a fearsome laugh the rotten corpse

Turned to the Doom Lord Kazzak on his knees.

Maggot brained Seriene metamorphosed

Into a demon queen and with a smile

Slaughtered the helpless beast upon his throne.

 

Amidst the looted corpses of friend and foe

Seriene did rise to Kil’jaedan’s seat.

There she sat and paused a while by bloody pools

Til with a sigh she stood once more and said

“There’s no rest for the wicked after all.”

 

The next quest awaited her.

 

 

Bahn the Bard

<!--EndFragment-->

 

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