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((Yeah. My flatmate wrote it. Pretty neat birthday gift))
O.O! Well done indeed!
Sing, mighty goddess, of the greatest quest
Of the fearsome maggot brained Seriene,
Who sought the power of all the worlds
And dreamed of holding it in her rotting hand.
She travelléd high, she travelléd low
And still she had so much farther to go.
From far off Silithus to Quel’Thalas,
No stone went unexploded as she searched
For limitless power, more power still.
Maggot brained Seriene slaughtered spiders,
Burned dens of infidels, stabbed squishy beasts.
She summoned demons and obliterated them.
She stormed castles and keeps, left none alive.
She would kill whole tribes and entire species,
For a magical ring of intellect plus five.
The dark depths of her desire knew no bounds;
Maggot brained Seriene would even descend
To making people like her, for power
Of every kind was to be her domain.
Nor fought she alone; the decaying corpse
Bound demons to service her every whim.
Loyal Phanuuz stood between his mistress
And many a fatal blow, while Kregal
Killed foe after foe as he dreamed of when
His axe would fall on a different neck.
Beside her too rode her comrades three,
Righteous Sonette, slayer of kittens;
Cunning Slyer, treacherous undead knave;
And Cow, brave, noble, author of this poem.
And now, along the great road to power,
A foe stronger than any before appeared.
Doom Lord Kazzak sat on Kil’jaedan’s Throne;
Maggot brained Seriene felt like regicide.
Atop her tower the corpse did arm
Her rotting frame with loot of battles past.
The Robes of Dark Suffering draped her grimy breast,
The Lurid Belt of Complicated Tortures cinched her waist.
Draped across her abscessed shoulders was the
Murky Cloak of Misery, and on her feet were the Fluffy Slippers.
Atop her rotting brow she put the Shadowy Crown of Pain,
And lo! she took the Shadowy Crown of Pain off
Because it clashed with the Murky Cloak of Misery.
Astride their flying steeds the four advanced,
With Seriene the Terrible leading the way.
Lightning flashed across the skies, and demon cries
Rent the very air in twain as the party flew o’erhead.
The Doom Lord raised his head to the high heavens
As the intrepid four dismounted far above.
Cunning Slyer buffed the descending heroes
To slow fall – but not Cow, who plummeted past.
The battle began, righteous Sonette
At the fore matching sword and shield
Against demonic claws and fel magics.
Back and forth they parried and thrust, til
With a mighty sweep of wicked wings
The Doom Lord knocked righteous Sonette
To the ravaged earth. Triumphant, the demon
Raised his depraved leg to crush the helpless elf.
With sudden swiftness cunning Slyer unleashed
The might of magic on the hapless foe.
Barrages of missiles, flames and frosts fired
Down upon Kazzak’s weakened form.
Under the mage’s covering fire, noble Cow
Or was it Tree? Restored the strength of the
Righteous Sonette with nature’s rejuvenation.
Meanwhile from on high, maggot brained Seriene
Surveyed the shifting tides of battle, waiting, waiting.
Below the hill the three did fight, Sonette the Valiant
Before the foe, kept alive with nature’s might
While overhead arcane spells collided with the beast.
The battle raged all through the night, until
By morning’s light the heroes and the demon
All were beaten, weak and wounded from the
Fierce conflict hidden in the darkling night.
Twas then that maggot brained Seriene struck.
She rained fire upon the hapless Tree,
And blasted cunning Slyer with shadow,
And coiled death round righteous Sonette.
So with ease did maggot brained Seriene
Obliterate her friends, who could only
Cry with their dying breaths, “Oom.”
Then with a fearsome laugh the rotten corpse
Turned to the Doom Lord Kazzak on his knees.
Maggot brained Seriene metamorphosed
Into a demon queen and with a smile
Slaughtered the helpless beast upon his throne.
Amidst the looted corpses of friend and foe
Seriene did rise to Kil’jaedan’s seat.
There she sat and paused a while by bloody pools
Til with a sigh she stood once more and said
“There’s no rest for the wicked after all.”
The next quest awaited her.
Bahn the Bard